Tuesday, March 5, 2013

A Show of Interest (The Girl)

Here is the girl's perspective from my friend Brittany of how she would show a guy she is interested along with some insight on a guy should show that he is interested. Enjoy. Also, if you like this and want to read more by Brittany, you can check out her blog here: www.notalwaysgold.com

How do I show a guy I'm interested..?  Well, I know this answer can vary from girl to girl but for me I think that I give off a natural glow or "spark" even.  Like if there's the instant attraction/interest when I meet a guy you can see if my eyes.  With that said, that kind of attraction rarely happens to me (those are definitely my favorite kind though).  But a more general response to that question is I'll pay attention to what he's saying, give eye contact and smile.  Again, that's more of when I first meet a guy.  But then once the "game" starts after we part ways I'll try my very best to not text him.  Because ultimately I would rather him text me first because if he texts me it means I was on his mind without having to do anything which shows some level of interest.  But sometimes I'm not very patient and I don't mind being forward so I'll spend about 10 minutes coming up with a sly way of contacting him so it looks more like it was necessary rather than because I wanted to.  Yeah, I definitely over think things and make it a tad more complicated that it could be but again, I want him to be a man about it and initiate anything that leads to us being more than friends.  From that point on when it comes to him talking to me or showing interest I'll reciprocate by being flirty back or just keep the conversation going.  That may not be the answer a guy would want to hear from me since it could just look like I'm being nice by talking to him but the guys I'm not interested in that show interest in me and initiate conversations and stuff, I generally don't respond to.  If there's some level of friendship there I'll respond but keep it vague and try to kill the conversation.  I'm horrible at rejecting guys (gotten better but still working on it) and really, most those guys just send me a message on Facebook and that's just lame anyways.  And for the few guys that ask for my number over Facebook and I'm not interested, I don't give it to them.  So yeah, to summarize: a guy will know I'm interested in him by the fact that I'm responsive to him in person and not.  He should be worried if I'm not responding or I'm vague when I do.  Sorry dudes!  Now, if we're on our first date and a guy is wondering about my interest level my response to that is again, I'll be responsive to him, eye contact, pay attention to him, etc. He should be worried if I'm looking around or asking him to repeat part of the conversation.  And when it comes to the physical attraction I try to keep my hands to myself in general (because I HATE initiating holding hands, first kiss, etc. And I know that from experience, I tested it once).  But with that said, I would try to be playful and touch his arm or shoulder to show I'm interested and to show it's okay to touch me.

When it come to guys showing interest in me, again back to what I mentioned before.  By him initiating conversations and things with me, it shows that I crossed his mind and he thought of me naturally.  And then when it comes to seeing each other by him asking me out on a date compared to asking me to "hang out" makes it more clear.  I'm a literal person and if you ask me to hang out I'm expecting to meet a guy somewhere, pay my way and be "neutral" towards him.  And by that I mean I won't be as flirty as I would be if it was intitally called a "date".  And for a date I would expect him to pick me up, open my door and pay for me.  Again, it just makes things more clear and shows the intention of things and what to expect.  Because if a guy asks to "hang out" it tells me that he's not interested in being more than friends and if he isn't willing to take me on a real date then he's not my type.  But when we're on a date and things are vibing well, I prefer him to be playful and somewhat sassy.  That's how I am when I flirt and it's fun to have playful banter when getting to know someone.  It shows they can let their guard down and just go with the flow.  And then the next thing is for him to touch my arm or shoulders sporadically.  Some physical contact is nice and then at some point holding my hand is a great way of showing he's interested.  Then from there it's whatever flows.  Over the next few dates and as things progress on their own it will be because of that initial mutual interest.  I also think it's important to be consistent.  If a guy shows interest but pulls back it can get confusing and almost not worth my time.  Games are fun in the very beginning but once there's been a few consecutive dates and there's been the first kiss I'm not a fan of a guy showing less interest in me and being a player about it.  Doesn't mean he has to be my boyfriend at that point, but just stay consistent with where we're at and only move forward - not back.

No comments:

Post a Comment