STAMPS: The Band

This week I would like to share with everyone a little golden gem that I discovered a little over a month ago. To allow you to fully appreciate the value of this gem however, I believe it prudent to give a brief summary of the back-story of how I came across this treasure.

Anyone who truly knows me knows that I have a strong passion for music. I hate going for long periods of time without listening to some form of music (a long time in this instance is anything over an hour) and am constantly on the search for new music that is unique, fun to listen to, and contains high-quality lyrics.

Well, at the beginning of August I attended a concert with a very good friend. She introduced me to the headlining band and I enjoyed listening to the clever comedic lyrics of the songs. One of the bands on the tour came out near the beginning of the concert. Two girls and three guys take the stage; all dressed in slightly different styles with one of the girls sticking out like a sore thumb. I was curious to see how they did and hear the sound this little known band would produce.

And then something amazing happened. They began to play some of the best music I have ever heard in my life. The upbeat smooth sound that rested upon my ears left me wanting more. Needless to say, this band most definitely surpassed my expectations. What was even more amazing was one of the girls, wearing a fun yellow striped shirt and blue skinny jeans with a blue bow in her hair, rocked the guitar like none other. I am usually a little skeptic of female musicians in bands, but love it when they get up there and kick butt on stage.

Put that together with a lead singer who is hilarious and a drummer that just doesn’t only play drums and you have one amazing band that attracts with pure, raw talent. No auto tuning required.

Now, back to the music. It is unique in itself in that it is something that I generally don’t come across. Most of what I tend to hear is whatever happens to be popular on the radio. I often look around for the hidden gems that hardly anybody has heard of, but it is difficult in a world where we are constantly being told what to listen to, what to wear and unfortunately, what to think. I was ecstatic to find a group that played what they wanted, how they wanted.

It is truly original and they sing what they feel. They put their hearts into the music, and have a natural talent for entertaining a crowd. One of the main things that attracted me to them was that they interacted with the audience, cracked jokes, invited people up on stage with them, and created an atmosphere that fit their style. They didn’t have to get people to fall in love with an image, they brought the real deal and what you saw was what you got.

I wish more bands like this one existed; bands that put out music because they want to, not because they are trying to please a general public.

And the name of this awesome band is…

STAMPS

To learn more about who Stamps the Band is, go to their website: www.stampstheband.com

You can also listen to samples of their music in the iTunes store by searching “Stamps” or listen to their latest album on their web page. They have two EPs out entitled “Tramps” and “Stamps: Ventures of a Lifetime”

The Best Ones Are At the Top

“Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy... So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.”

I have seen this quote a few times on various Facebook pages and other places, usually posted by some girl who is fed up with being ignored by guys, only going out with complete jerks, or some other apparently failed attempt at procuring a mate worthy of their “amazingness.” Well, this one is for all those ladies that hang at the top of the tree waiting for the “right man to come along.”

I have known many good men who have walked by this metaphorical apple tree and seen the bright red juicy apples at the top and decided they wanted one. So they go about finding a ladder that will reach the top, but inevitably, there is never a ladder tall enough to reach the one he has his eye on. So, with the risk of falling and breaking a bone (or many), he begins to climb the frail branches, carefully placing his feet so his weight is distributed in just the right way to keep him from breaking the feeble boughs and plummeting to the Earth.

Finally, he reaches the apple he as longed for and plucks her from her sky-high branch. He feels he has won the greatest prize on Earth and cannot wait to take her home to show his friends the wonderful fruit he has procured. But, on the way down something tragic happens. He is descending slowly and ever so carefully as to not bruise his delicate apple, but then unexpectedly, the apple falls from his hand and tumbles to the ground.

Devastated, he rushes to the ground to try and rescue his apple that he so gently carried all this time, but alas, by the time he reaches her, she is whisked away by one of those who wishes not to attempt the dangerous climb, but rather picks up what has already fallen at his feet. Thus it happens, that the man who risked his life is left stunned, wondering why the apple fell from his grasp. Perhaps something is wrong with him, was he too caring, did he grip her too tightly, or say something wrong? Why, oh why, would she fall to the ground after all he did to get that dear precious apple?

That is just one possible scenario; another is that the apples friends think this man is not good enough for their beautiful friend and knock him out of the tree. The apple herself decides to wait for a better man to come along and stubbornly clings on to her branch, but the waiting is in vain and when she tries to attract the man back to her branches, he has found another apple that was grateful for all he did to obtain her ruby red lusciousness. Whatever the reason, this good-hearted man did everything right, and yet it still wasn’t enough.

I have never understood this and it will most likely baffle me to the end of my days. Girls complain that they can’t find a good man in the world and fear they are doomed to live their lives alone with dozens of cats in a house where the lawn is overgrown with rose bushes. Then, a man comes along and she is excited. He makes her laugh, treats her like a princess and posses many, if not all the qualities of the man she has often dreamed of. But then, for one reason or another, the girl decides he not handsome enough, he walks with a limp, has a weird laugh, his left pupil is slightly larger than his right iris. There is always some excuse. Then when this man is gone, they return to the complaining and wondering why men aren’t ever interested in them.

Then, in their desperation to have someone love them, they go with next guy that comes along and all to often, he is a complete and total deuchbag. HE treats her kindly every once in a blue moon, but always leaves her wondering, crying in her bed late at night while he is off doing as he pleases. But, she is afraid she will never find anyone else that will have her, so she sticks around for the few and far-in-between occurrences of affection.

Well, all I have to say is that while I am not surprised at this common reaction I see from my friends of the female type. We often do not realize when there is something amazing right in front of us until it is too late. Those who are lucky realize what they have before them and hold onto it for the rest of eternity.

Now, I realize this isn’t always the case and not just any good man is right for just any amazing girl, but may I just propose that we be a little more aware of the people that come into our lives, and really look more at who the person is than at what, or who, the person looks like. Every girl deserves a man who will risk the climb to get to her, but the man who does the climbing should be the one who gets the prize, not the guy who waits for the apple to drop at his feet.

Relationships: They're All Around Us

Their is a peculiar aspect to Utah that is rarely found anywhere else in the world. In a culture that expounds quite often on the importance of relationships and maintaining a good amount of communication in those relationships, it often falls short in one of the most important relationships we may have with others, that of driving together on the same road.

In a college course I took that dealt with the topic of dating and marriage, I learned that communication is the most vital aspect of these relationships, along with any others we may have with our fellow man. If we desire the other person to treat us in a specific manner, we must communicate clearly and respectfully what we want. We must also learn to listen to the needs of the other person and form compromises where necessary for any relationship to flourish.

Unfortunately, this concept is lost when it comes to driving in Utah. I cannot count the number of times I have seen accidents occur, or almost occur, due to the complete lack of communication. A car decides to change lanes with out signaling and cuts off another that is traveling at a higher velocity. Another driver gets angry when some indicates they are moving over to the next lane with ample time for the angry driver to know they are coming and move in the path of travel of the said angry driver. These are the most common incidents I run into while traveling through Utah. Along with the incessant need to drive no more than twelve inches from the car in front of you while traveling twenty over the posted speed limit.

Many problems that occur while people are driving are due to strict negligence to communicating one's intentions; it's amazing how much can be avoided by the simple use of a blinker. The same goes for any type of relationships. I find it extremely annoying when in movies the main couple run into some sort of road bump, and one gets angry and refuses to let the other explain what really happened. The whole incident could be avoided if they just listened to what the other had to say. It's almost as if we are being taught that we must avoid letting others know of our intentions, that in so doing we reveal some weakness or dependence we have on others.

Also, when one person desires to express something they need, the other cannot become angry or offended, especially when the person asking is constantly giving to the other so that the person is happy and comfortable. We all live in this world together, and we must all share the same road, so let's allow everyone else to know what are plans are so they do not become a hinderance to them.

Many people I talk to about such things often agree with me, but I wonder if we fully comprehend the importance of the matter. I am not saying that I am not part of the problem, I have often been part of the cause of many problems, both on the road and off, because I refuse to communicate my needs to the other person so they can accommodate them. All I wish to say is that we learn to listen more than we talk and try to understand what is really required to accommodate those we interact with. 

Friends, What Are They Good for Anyway?

I often run into a social phenomenon that constantly astounds me every time it occurs. I have met quite a number of people since I left my not so small town of Nampa, ID; and many of them have quickly become "friends." We spend a fair amount of time together, do various activities together, and act like we have known each other our entire lives. Then, for varying reasons, we don't see each other for a while (life gets busy, moving to a new apartment, etc.) whatever the reason, we lose touch.

But then, we run into each other and one of the first things I hear from their mouth is, "why haven't you kept in touch," or something to that effect. I have never understood this. Why is it my sole responsibility to maintain the friendship? Since when has any relationship survived thanks to the efforts of one. I have never seen it happen. And, to set the record straight, I have often made attempts to invite the person to a party and maintain some form of contact with them since the long "absence" began.

So, I would like to suggest that perhaps we think again about why a friendship really ended. We may even need to ask ourselves why the friendship ended at all. Perhaps it has nothing to do with the fact that two people haven't seen each other in a long time, but perhaps one of the two have stopped putting forth the effort.

I would like to present one example for your consideration:

I am an avid ballroom dancer and compete on an individual basis with a partner. One particular partner I had became a good friend and we often did various activities together or would go to parties with other friends we had in common. We shared many good times, and then came the break. Over the course of a couple months of not seeing each other due to varying circumstances, we ran into each other, (I should mention that we had stopped competing together by this time) and the usual conversation took place.

We decided to get together and catch up on the time we hadn't seen each other. I set up the engagement and we had a good time. We then a period of several months only running into each other on rare occasion and with little time to talk, despite frequent invites I had extended to different social gatherings. At this particular meeting, my friend decided that we should get together and catch up, I agreed and told her to contact me with specifics on when and where she wanted to meet.

Well, needless to say, she never called. I was tired of putting effort into a one sided relationship, and so I let it fade. To me, our friendship obviously meant little to her and other priorities took precedence, so I stopped trying.

Now, you can analyze this experience as you may, I don't really care. All I wish to convey is that we think twice about why friendships die, and maybe pay more attention to those who are extending an extra effort to maintain those friendships. We meet lots of people throughout our lives. Faces are constantly entering and exiting, so I shush to pose a single question: Are we really keeping track of the ones we really want to keep there?

Independence Day: A Day for Celebrating Greatness

I had decided to write a blog about the Disservice of Customer Service (a string of bad experiences lead me to this decisions), but I decided a more appropriate topic would be the the 4th of July, the day of Independence for the Great U.S. of A. I have always enjoyed the 4th and all the celebrating that comes with it (especially the fireworks).

Yesterday I had the wonderful opportunity to attend the amazing Stadium of Fire. It is one of the largest Independence Day Celebrations in America with tens of thousands attending each year. It starts of with a most magnificent flag ceremony concluding with a fly over by a squadron of Fighter Planes from the Air Force. It is then followed by a most outstanding concert and concludes with the most amazing firework display I have ever seen.

Aside from the fireworks, the best part of whole experience was that fact that Brad Paisley, Country Music Star Extraordinaire, put on an awesome concert. Having grown up on Country Music and then transitioned to Rock, I had forgotten how wonderful it is to listen to. About half the songs Brad played made some reference to the greatness of the USA and how wonderful it is to live in a country with the freedoms provided all its citizens.

I feel that a mention of America the Great is one thing that is lacking from much of today's music. A lot of it talks about love and how we all need to get along with each other, but what about the relationship we all share with our country. If it is such a grand place to live, then why do we have so many problems blamed on the government and the people that run it.

I often hear others complain about how this country has been slowly taking away the rights of the people. How our freedom is slowly turning into bondage. Well, in part I would have to agree with some of the accusations being made, but I don't particularly like that way the people blame those who are elected to run this great country. A large part of the blame lies on those who have elected these officials into office.

I wish I could remember where I heard it and who said it, but I recall a man who made a statement that it is up to the people of the United States to make it politically advantageous for politicians to make the decisions that would ensure we maintain the freedoms originally granted us in the Constitution and Declaration of Independence. In today's world, many people vote for leaders who make large promises with almost no plan nor intention of implementing those promises, rather they go ahead with their own private agendas.

They go about this way because they realize that the people will do little about. Sure we might voice a complaint or two, but we never remove these leaders for others because they do enough and say enough to keep us believing they have our best interest at heart. If we only realized that we as a people do hold the power to change the fate of our country. It truly is a great land.

If we vote for those who do what they promise then politicians will soon realize that they must do what we want them to if they want to remain in a place of such prestige.

That is what makes this country a place of freedom and liberty, its people. As long as they make wise choices in who leads over them, then they will maintain this gift that should be precious to all.

Happy

Independence Day everyone.

P.S.

I would also like to give a shout out to all military members, their families and all those that give them their love and support. Too many don't realize what they actually do for us as a country and for others. They ensure that we maintain our freedom to vote whomever we may so choose into office and live how we may choose, whether it be in accordance with the laws or not (and we must accept all consequences of those choices whether they be good or bad). They sacrifice more than many people will ever know, and do it of their own free will and choice. Props to them and thank-you to all.

The Beast: Misbehaved or Misunderstood?

A couple of weeks ago I watched Disney's Beauty and the Beast. I have always enjoyed this movie (yes, even as a little kid and on until the present) and love seeing the transformation that the character of the Beast takes on throughout the movie. But, this last time I noticed some things that lead me to believe that the Beast is simply misunderstood. The supposed heart of ice is simply a perversion of the true character of the Beast that storytellers have imagined to create a more intriguing story line that will sell more books and more movies.

So, what is the true character of the Beast? Well, allow me to shed a little light on the subject. In the beginning of the story we know that the Beast is visited by an enchantress who determines that he has no love in his heart and is therefore cursed until he can learn to love and be loved in return. I do not think that this was a just punishment for the cruel treatment that the enchantress received and is in reality an exaggeration of what really happened. Throughout the movie we find glimpses into the Beast's past relationships and I would like to share them with you now.

When Belle first comes to the Castle she promises the Beast to remain his prisoner in exchange for the life and freedom of her father. The Beast accepts the trade and after releasing the father, leads Belle to her room where she will remain for the rest of her days. The fact that the Beast gives her a nice room to stay in shows that he can be quite hospitable to his guests. He gives her free roam of the castle, with a couple exceptions, as well as access to all the amenities the castle has to offer. This is a clear sign that Beast is not as cold hearted as we are lead to believe.

In connection to the hospitality of the Beast, we watch a few scenes later that Belle, while on a tour of the castle, enters an area that the Beast asked her to stay out. She enters what appears to be his private room full of his keepsakes. It is quite understandable that the Beast would be a little perturbed when he catches Belle going through his things. All he did was ask Belle to respect his property and his privacy in return for his hospitality and she quite promptly disobeyed those wishes.

Now, I would normally think the harsh reaction of the Beast would be an extreme, but it is clear that he has run into this issue more than once. Belle's father trespassed on his property, and entered his home without even so much as a knock on the door. I am sure others have done the same given that the Beast can be quite patient with others.

I know I am taking a leap by granting the Beast the virtue of patience, but I will explain. Earlier on during the same evening that Belle breaks the trust given by the Beast, she is asked to dinner by the Beast and she just completely stands him up. I think that's a little rude considering he just gave her what almost any girl I know would want, a castle. When the Beast learns she isn't coming to dinner, which she didn't even have the nerve to tell him herself, he goes to her room to find out why. Now, Belle states that he didn't ask politely, and even when he does, she still refuses.

In the Beast's defense, I think he is justified in his actions being that through the media we are taught that women want a man who can take charge. Unfortunately, the take charge type also happens to be the arrogant jerk type who treats women like crap. The Beast tried to be the thoughtful, sensitive man women claim they want, but with constant rejections and seeing girls fall for the jerks, I completely understand his change of tactics.

I believe there is also a second factor that plays into the Beast's reaction to the rejection of his dinner invite. On the walk to Belle's room the Beast makes an attempt to talk with Belle, to get to know her and maybe find a few common interests they share, but he is clearly timid about the whole matter. Is it due to his lack of people skills? I doubt it. I think it is simply caused by the fact that Belle is a stunning young woman, and like many men I know (including myself), the Beast is nervous and often stumbles in the attempt to make a good impression on the girl with the hopes that she may be even slightly interested in him.

Now, it is only after two ginormous events that we see Belle's attitude toward the Beast begin to change. The first takes place after she first runs away from the castle. Shortly after fleeing the castle when caught with her hand in the cookie jar, Belle is chased and trapped by a pack of wolves. She attempts to fight them off, but utterly fails. Now, the Beast, feeling bad about having reacted in such anger, goes after Belle to make amends while also knowing that the woods are no place for a lady to be wandering around alone at night. He sees her in peril, and being the gentleman he is, promptly intervenes to save Belle's life.

It takes this act to show Belle that he cares for her and will take care of her no matter what. You would think that offering her a roof over her head with a bed to sleep in and plenty of food to eat would be enough, but no, Belle had to be rescued before she would even consider eating dinner with the Beast.

The second act takes place a while later. Belle and the Beast have had time to get to know each other and have become good friends. the Beast, like most good men who know how women should be treated, wants to do something special for Belle. He has learned her interests and her hobbies and decides to give her a gift. He has the library cleaned and organized all for Belle. It may be a little extravagant and over the top, but the Beast just doesn't see a single book as being good enough for Belle. Plus, what could be better than receiving one book as a gift? A whole room of books. Belle is extremely enthusiastic about the gift and the Beast receives the best gift a guy could ask for, seeing the girl smile.

Now, back to the beginning of the story and little more on the twists that have perverted the true story of Beauty and the Beast. I believe that in reality, the enchantress was actually a former girlfriend of the Beast. He loved her and wanted to give her everything she could possibly dream of, but it was never enough. She kept demanding more and more of the Beast until finally he had enough. Realizing that the enchantress was really just using him, the Beast broke up with her. She had probably never been broken up with before, and, infuriated, did what most exes in that situation do; spread harsh lies about the Beast to make it seem like she is the victim and played no foul in the matter. The Beast was then betrayed and abandoned by those he thought to be his friends, thus driving him into a life of isolation.

So, is the Beast really a heartless monster who is incapable of love? Clearly not. He is merely a guy who has had too many bad experiences with women, and when he finally met the love of his life, it took a little while to overcome those experiences and break down the walls that had been built over many agonizing relationships.

A Phone Call Will Say More Than You Think Silence May

Recently I have had an extremely difficult time getting people to respond to invites I make for various functions, dates, etc. I call, text, Facebook, or use other means of communication and never hear back from people as to whether or not they will be attending. This can get extremely frustrating in planning and coordinating with others when there lie these uncertainties in the equation. It is especially frustrating when trying to set up a date with a girl.

Now, I can understand that people need time to check their calendars and make sure they don´t have any conflicts with whatever it is I may be planning, but to leave a person hanging with no idea as to what you are planning is just plain rude. I believe there should be a standard when it comes to replying to an invitation. Now, depending on how far in advance I can understand why it may take longer to respond than if the invitation were given closer to the actual event, but let me propose a timeline for you to consider.

If the invite is extended anywhere from a week to a week and a half in advance, I believe no more than two days should pass with you responding. shorter would be preferable, but I understand that things are crazy from time to time, but 48 hours is more than enough time to check a small book or a your phone to determine whether or not you will be able to make the proposed engagement. This would hold particularly true if someone calls and asks you out on a date. Why keep someone waiting for a phone call that only has to last a few seconds, just enough to give a simple yes or no, if that is all you have time for.

If the invite is out more than a couple weeks out from the event date, then waiting a little while more to respond is perfectly acceptable, but don´t let it drag on. A response would be given no later than a week before the occasion. A party can take a lot of planning, and I know personally that it is nice knowing how much food to get so that there is plenty to go around. So, as you can see, responding in a timely matter is pivotal for the other person. Not to mention, responding in a timely matter shows respect and great maturity.

You may be thinking that I am finished but there is more to responding than doing so in a timely manner. As mentioned at the beginning of this little rant, there are various means of communication these days, and each has it´s own level of importance. We have Facebook, texting, phone calls, and face to face as the main means of communicating these days, so how do we know with what means to answer a request to go out with a friend? First, we must rate the level of each communication accordingly. I propose the following scale:

            1. Face to face

            2. Phone call

            3. Text

            4. Facebook

the list is in order from most important, to least. now if someone asks you face to face, it would be proper to to respond in like manner. Also, to set a general rule, a response should not be given in a means less than what the invite was extended. To present a couple examples:

           1. If John invites a group of friends over for a party via Facebook, then Facebook would be the lowest level allowing for all types of responses.

          2.  Now, if John calls Jane to ask her out on a date for Friday night, then a phone call would be the lowest response method Jane would be allowed to use to give John an answer.

Therefore, a text should not be used to respond to a phone call, let alone a face to face encounter. Using these methods will help us to realize that people should be treated with the same respect they show to us.

Hopefully this information has been helpful and will prove useful in the not to distant future. Until next time. 

(Just a quick note on the pictures, the first one is how I often feel when someone won't return a phone call, and the last is somewhat the conversation that goes on in my head when a girl won't return my phone call. Just some examples of how I really feel about this.)